Where were you when the world stopped turning? I remember each minute of that day - the fear, the confusion, the relief, the anger, the love, the pride and the hope. I remember the trust in our President to get us through that painful time. I remember the emotion on the faces of those on television and the awkwardness of the commentators on tv in not knowing what was coming and where they were headed.
Where am I today? I sit thinking of that day and I sit looking forward. Time.com has an amazing website that reads, "If the story of the United States has a theme so far in the 21st century, it is surely one of resilience.". Resilience. What a word. Within it lies the hope that this country can come together once again, that we are strong enough to survive whatever is thrown at us. Rise up, America. Stay strong, head up and confident. Your people will stand behind you...we love you. (http://www.time.com/time/beyond911/)
Resilience - the resilience of love, the resilience of friendship, the resilience of family, the resilience of faith...resilience. Today not only marks the tenth anniversary of the attacks on our soil, but also the opening Sunday of Football 2011. The NFL honored those fallen and lost in 9-11 in a beautiful way...with the Chicago Bears having the Blackhawks National Anthem singer to sing. AMAZING. His voice is booming and loud and those Chicago fans went crazy - they hooped and hollered through the entire anthem and while the nation watches, maybe wondering why we are so disrespectful, I look on with honor and pride at those celebrating this country and keeping the Chicago tradition alive. What a great way to incorporate a sad and somber day/moment into one of the happiest of the year for many...the day that signifies Fall...the day Football begins.
To my friend whose day has become more somber and full of loss, I am sorry and my thoughts are with you. A loss and as you said, a reminder of how short life can be. Your heart is in my prayers, Friend.
The Valley of the Sun...yep - they were right!
We are almost three months into our Arizona adventure and the most common question I receive? "Why in the world would you move here in June?!?!" You know - I didn't think much of it for most of our time here...until last night.
Sun Devil Football opening game, September 1, 2011. I was so excited to go and so appreciative of the tickets given to me by a co-worker. Tim and I head in and sit....and sweat, and sweat and sweat. GROSS. I've sat through many sporting events where I have just felt super gross, but last night took the prize. You see, at a daytime NASCAR race I am prepared for the heat (and humidity back home), but here...it is dark and yet the temperature is no less than when the sun was out - I am only missing the sun directly on my skin. I was prepared to be uncomfortable, to be hot...but I was not prepared for the overall miserable feeling my body had. I think I lost every ounce of water possible and my sweat found new ways to roll down my body. Again, gross! When we took the tickets out of our pockets...they were crinkly and a bit wet.
So, to everyone that asked me if I was crazy...apparently I was. To everyone who keeps telling me that it isn't getting better yet and the nights are as hot as the days...you were right. Where is a good crisp fall day when I need one?
The best parts of the evening?
1. Seeing my first large university football game
2. Having the opportunity to begin new friendships
3. Realizing I do not want to attend an outdoor event in the evening until October.
FEAR THE FORK!
What a day...what a few weeks, maybe months. Ever have those days when you can't believe it is you who is allowing the words to come out of your mouth? Yeah, me too. I feel like I have been completely overwhelmed lately, stressed out and wanting to become a hermit to escape it all...but I can't. So what, you may ask, do I do? Well, apparently I nag...yep, I have turned into a nag in the past few months!
Who am I? This is incredibly insane and ridiculously unlike me (or so I think and like to believe). I need an outlet so that my outlet is no longer Tim...while I feel like sometimes he takes things out on me, I sat back tonight, while sweating, overheated and miserable, realizing that while yes, we both take out stress on one another - I instigate much of it, I continue much of it and I start most of it. ALARMS ARE NOW GOING OFF IN MY BRAIN!! I am not this woman - I am not the woman that the man doesn't want to be around, or talk to, or love. No...I'm the cool woman, the one that other guys say, "hey, I hope I can find one like that someday". Wow...where did I go.
Well...now that I have seen fireworks tonight (both literally...thank you Sun Devil football...and figuratively), there is work to do. I have already previously decided to overhaul my diet and exercise because I am not happy with it...well, when I'm not happy with that, I am apparently miserable all around. I refuse to be a miserable woman and a woman that my husband just gets used to hearing nag and therefore no longer listens. I have to get this all out somewhere else...here? I don't want to air out laundry (clean or dirty) with anyone, really...maybe I'll take up knitting...or maybe more yoga, meditation? Going back to church will be a huge help for me - that spiritual recharge is sometimes exactly what is needed. Life is falling into place but inside of this fall are many of the most stressful situation ever encountered and I need to combat that stress and not beat my husband with it or shove it his way to deal with. It is me, I am strong, confident and able...I have God on my side, I have my loving husband who is putting up with my crazy and I have my pity party - who so very quickly needs to be uninvited to this party. I can do this. I will do this. I will remove my awful (yet clean) tasting foot out of my mouth and speak kind words, think kind thoughts and live a kind life.
